Thursday, August 12

Moving on

So I have moved this here blog over to word press....

You can find me here: http://firstimehitched.wordpress.com/

Hope you'll come and join me too x

Thursday, August 5

Inspiration

So I'm sitting at home, in my comfy chair; laptop in front of me on terrace table (what, don't judge me), and all day long I have ideas on what to write about. Maybe have a little quote that I might use. A whole dialogue written out in my mind. But obviously this all happens at work, where I can't write my blog and therefore I have to condense my thoughts until its time to go home. Only for me to get home and sit in a perfect position and come up with NOTHING. Absolutely nothing.

I have posts in my head that will only seem relevant once a certain date comes around (September will be an awesome month) and I have topics I want to broach but more thought needs to go into it first.
I am an avid reader of so many blogs and the writing is so original and (this is going to be cheesy) inspirational, that it makes me want to be a better writer. That being said, I am in no way a writer, but I do LOVE writing. I don't want to let the blogging world or readers of this blog (hello? Hello? is there anyone there?) down with my inane observations or banter.

I am new to this and I am finding my feet. I want to  will talk about what it is like to be married when you haven't before and all the new things that happen and things that change.

Bear with me, it WILL get good.

Tuesday, August 3

Happy times

After my moment yesterday, I decided to list the good things that are coming up in my life.

(Yes, I am a lists type of person)


1. Nieces' Birthday BBQ, this coming weekend, they are having a joint party
2. Looooong weekend 13th-17th August
3. Finally meeting up with my best friend, Suzan
4. Finally seeing my Godson, Adam
5. Better off Ted being on FX (Does the humour remind anyone else of Dead Like me?)
6. Breaking Bad Season 2 arriving via Love Film.
7. Blip.fm
8. Hubs not doing night shifts for at least two weeks after tonight
9. My Glamour magazine subscription, which just keeps arriving even though I could've sworn it run out in May (Please don't shop me in to Conde Nast)
10. Wedding album hopefully arriving.any.day.now. SQUEEEE!

So yea, its getting good.

Monday, August 2

Monday blues

So we are at end of another Monday.
A Monday where I got those nerves in my stomach.
You know those nerves which, if your like me, determine if you have a good day or not.
A Monday where I had a moment in Liverpool Street station and had to stop amongst the mayhem of commuters and wonder what I was doing there.

I have not taken my anti-depressants for 8 weeks. We've been back from Canada for 8 weeks and when we got back, it seemed as good a time as any to stop taking them as I was finally feeling like I could cope. I was In a good place.

Today, my moment in the station made me realise how far I had come in 2 months.
It made me realise that its OK to get a little overwhelmed and have some anxiety to prove that I can get over it.

It felt like it I couldn't move. I was stuck still and my breath escaping me. Everyone was moving around but it was slowed down. I was in a still of a movie with the background blurring and becoming hazy. Me, I was suddenly in clear cut focus. I wish I knew what triggered it. Sleep came easy to me the night before; I got to see my Husband in the morning; I wasn't stressed by travelling. It just happened.

It was scary, but I took a deep breath and looked around, and walked on.

I class this as a triumph. I could've quite easily broken down and walked away and curled up at home.
But, I didn't.

I might not be out of the woods yet, but at least I can see a clearing.